... on November 1!

I'll be writing alllllll weekend like an insane thing.

Wish me luck!

I just know you all have gone about your business long since, figuring
I might never be heard from again. I have read each of your comments
with great enjoyment, but when I think of taking the time to write some
thoughts here, I just determinedly move on to the next assignment,
reading, essay, whatever.... but it's Sunday  night and I just
can't focus on the books anymore.

My Old Norse studies are coming along; we have just translated good old
Snorri Sturluson's passage describing Ragnarokr, the twilight of the
gods, the end of the world. Nasty. Imagine people who knew that their
own gods and creators would be destroyed along with all else when the
final doom fell. This kind of fatalism was shared by the sailor on the
pre-modern sea -- he knew that matters of life and death were
determined in advance, and there was no sense in fretting about it.

I, however, have a keen sense that studying like a maniac for each
little quiz will have a great bearing on my mark. Nouns, masculine,
feminine, neuter. Strong verbs, weak verbs, just plain bizarre verbs.
Case, number, gender. Present, past. Pronouns, prepositions, and odd
little particles lurking about here and there looking enigmatic.

In contemporary Canadian poetry, I have discovered the poetry of
Christopher Dewdney. If I hold this stuffy-looking gold gilt frame up
and look at him through it, he is an environmental science professor at
York University here in Ontario. Through this other frame though (what
does it look like? hmm), he is the most fun Canadian poet I've
discovered in a long time. Clever wordplay. When a scientist writes a
really good poem informed by his scientific understanding, you really
get to go places and see sights. I'm too tired to go into it, but I'll
probably write more about him one day. If you see any of his stuff,
check it out.

In my Gothic course, we are onto Blade Runner and Alien!
I'm about to write an essay about why we human beings are so interested
in the non-human, whether undead, inorganic or off-planet. I've got
some good ideas after reviewing these films (and reading P.K. Dick's Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?). This is just a lark of a course. Oh, I read Laurell Hamilton's Guilty Pleasures
too. I can't recommend that one, though... I think it represents the
decadence and coming death of the mod-vampire genre. It is as if a
genre could "jump the shark" just like the Fonz. All oddity and
novelty, no substance. I dunno. When you get vampires filling out tax
returns and waiting for the bus, what do you really have?

My thesis. I have 3500 more words to write on the section that is due
November 1. I love studying the history of law, especially with this
Old Norse connection, and i have never had more fun working on any
project. However, the pace is getting to me. So I'm excited and
motivated, but. You know how it is. Or I bet you can imagine, anyway. I
don't dare read anybody else's blog at this point, for fear of being
caught up in a whirlwind of envy about someone else's vacation pics!

My life as a TA is quite interesting and varied. I have decided that I
oughtn't to write about specifics here, since I am helping 40
first-year students navigate through what has got to be one of the
roughest patches of their lives, and empathy is strongly called for. I
will say that I am learning a great deal, both about my own limitations
and about their abilities. Their first essay is due November 7. I hope
I will do a good job of marking it!

Hope you are all doing well. Perhaps sometime in December I'll take a day off and tour the Xangaworld. Until we 'meet' again,

CG

Good day, all! Today is  Thanksgiving Monday here in Canada. We
aren't quite as serious about celebrating this holiday as Americans are
(for us, Christmas is bigger), but still, I had an enormous turkey
dinner last night amidst all nearby relatives, so I am content.

However, it took some time that I would ordinarily spend on coursework,
so I've arisen bright and early today to try to make it up a bit. I
have an essay due on Wednesday, and I'm finding that if I work like the
dickens, I can stay ahead of weekly work... but essays are extra.
Somebody grant me an extra day of the week between Friday and Saturday,
and I'd come out ahead in this race for sure.

This essay's for my "Gothic since 1900" class -- I'm talking about the
evolution of the early Gothic "damsel in distress" into the
"distressing damsel" of modern Gothic fiction. The general idea is that
modern Gothic novels explore societal anxieties about gender roles,
just like the early fiction did, but in our postmodern times, there are
no easy guidelines, and so the picture which appears now is grimmer,
more ambiguous. How ought men and women to behave towards one another?
There aren't any hard and fast rules anymore, are there. Well, this
sure shows up on Gothic fiction. To participate in this assignment,
read Fight Club and Secret Window, Secret Garden, and then give your perspective on Marla and Amy.

This is a fun little essay (or would be if I really had enough time to
write it -- my thesis prof is going to be a bit disappointed about my
accomplishments this week). The one that's due the week after this is a
bit thornier.

Okay, I've used Xanga to whine and complain quite enough for one day!
*grin* I very much hope you are all doing well. Poised on the brink of
another precipitous week, I remain, yours ever,

CG

I find it amazing how quickly the days trundle past when you are busy.
I love the subjects I'm studying, but I just wish I had more time to
study them! It's crazy how many deadlines I have coming up -- I see
them like a thicket of hurdles ahead.

I lead two first-year seminars -- one cheery, one quiet. Anybody with
advice on how to shake up a quiet seminar, be sure to let me know. It's
not that they won't talk, but they won't smile, laugh, or indeed,
change the expressions on their faces, and if I am not actually calling
for a response, the silence is profound. Maybe some small-group work
next week will do the trick?

A friend threw a housewarming party last night. She called me up,
understandably worried that so many people had cancelled on her at the
last minute that maybe nobody would be there at all. Doesn't everyone
have the fear that they'll throw a big party one day and no one will come over? It all hearkens back to children's birthday-party insecurities, I believe.

I had intended to come since the very second I received the funny
invite with a cute little flowery frock on it and the caption: "A
change of a dress." Who could resist? Plus she's one of my oldest
friends, a real sweetie. Anyway, it all worked out just fine. I think
there were about 10 people who did make it, and we had first choice of
our hostess's wonderful nibbles. She lives near a famous old farmer's
market, and mmm, could you tell. Silly people who cancelled! It was the
tastiest evening in a long time, and that new place is warmed right up
now.

Okay, gonna get back to work. Old Norse strong verbs and nouns, translating Hrafnkel's saga, reading.... Interview with the Vampire?! Yep, I got a varied courseload this term!

Well.

I won't be getting any awards anytime soon, but I got through two
teaching-assistant experiences with no undue problems. I guess. I am
sure I talked too much, but what else is new with me?

I'll work on that part. The students need to do the talking, after all
-- it's their seminar. I'm going to attend some TA workshops, and
perhaps those will help me learn how to make things go more smoothly.
It doesn't seem too hard to lead a seminar if you're watching someone
who's good at it. As usual, though, when you're the one in the hot
seat, it begins to occur to you that a little training might not hurt.

I was euphoric on Thursday afternoon after turning in that week's
seminar grades (did I mention that I must grade short written responses
the students have to hand in?), but now I'm face to face with the
craggy, rocky hill of next week. I'm going to make it though. I've got that part determined.

My husband is coming down to visit me this weekend, thank goodness.
Doing without him is the hardest part of being a student, harder than
all the readings, writings, and arithmetics that school can throw at me.

Anyway, before I wander off all exhausted and get blissfully
unconscious, I thought I'd pass along an interesting website I found
called the Speech Accent Archive.
It allows you to listen to people from all over the world saying a few
words in English. I am sure it is useful to linguists, but I thought
the variety of accents was fascinating, especially across the United
States and in different areas of England.

Hi everybody, and welcome to a new week.

I'm getting pretty crazed already, but one of my courses is so
different from the others that it's somewhat of a break to indulge in
it. Its name is in my blog title today.

The reading list for this course is quite modern and interesting. You
may recognize such names as Fight Club, V is for Vendetta (a graphic
novel!), Secret Window (Stephen King!), The Lathe of Heaven. All told,
nine modern novels are on the course, most of which have major motion
pictures associated with them. Although there will be a focus on the
text, in many ways this course could just as easily be a film or pop
culture credit.

The prof told us right off the bat that this is an experimental course,
and that he is not enitrely convinced that there is really a modern
"Gothic" tradition in literature. Back in Victorian times, Gothic used
to denote medievalish stuff with castles, maidens in distress, unknown
evil twins, supernatural forces.... I'm interested to find that so far,
the most "Gothic" aspect of, say, Fight Club and Secret Window is the
doubling -- in these cases, psychological (schizophrenic, insane)
doubling. But does that make it part of a tradition stretching back a
couple of hundred years? Not sure. It seems to me that "Gothic" may
just be another word for "creepy" nowadays.

I'm not the kind of person who normally indulges in a horror movie here
and there -- they give me nightmares. But I have now read my first
Stephen King novel with accompanying movie. It turns out that the
movies bother me more because you get to actually see a person with an
axe in his head instead of just reading about it. But my enjoyment
(enjoyment? hmm) of this type of book or move is hampered, not by the
blood and violence, but by the inevitable stupidity of the main
character.

Rule #1 of being a scary-movie protagonist: DO NOT CALL THE POLICE. No matter what ominous signs of impending doom may appear.

Well, of course, the dudes in Fight Club and Secret Window have
particular reasons for not calling the police, reasons which appear
later in the stories. But honestly, if you come upon a dead body, don't
you think you'd call the cops? Yep. So would I. But that would ruin the
story! Interestingly, in the movie Secret Window, the main character is
more honest with the authorities than his counterpart in the book. I
guess that's all part of the mystery of film adaptations.

Well, back to the grind. I hope you all have a good week. I'll let you
know how my first TA experience goes -- I'll be leading my first two
first-year seminars on Wednesday!

Wow, things sure are heating up quickly around here!

The English department at my university doesn't have enough grad
students to help professors as teaching assistants, so I was
recommended to fill in the gap. I'll be leading two first-year seminars
and marking their essays, and by the end of the year I'll have a TA
certificate too, which may help me later if I decide to go into
teaching at some level.

This is great, because the grad program I'm thinking of at U of T
doesn't offer much teaching experience. So I get to find out if I'd
like to teach at the university level -- right here, right now!

I just hope this won't compromise my coursework. I need very high grades this year. But I just couldn't pass up the opportunity!

Xanga-wise, I'm in the sad position right now of being able to read
your kind comments without having much time to visit your sites and
keep up with you all. I'm so sorry about that. You'll see me sometimes,
though -- just not every day!

*looks about nervously, rushes off*

Okay, CG the scholar here. I've had only one actual class so far, the
introduction to Old Norse. Arcane, eh? That's the language all the
great Viking myths and sagas are written in. You know, Thor and Loki
and Eirik the Red and Leif the Lucky and so on. Well, anyway, it's
great fun to read that stuff in translation, and I've been looking
forward to reading it in the original.

Language study used to feel interminable. It was a bit like learning to
play the piano with one of those Mel Bay lesson books. You never really
felt you were playing the piano,
not for real, not while tapping out little "serenade to the moon" type
exercises or whatever. Likewise, with language learning, it was an
awfully long time before the first moment when you could say GEE WHIZ I'm speaking that language now aren't I?!

Well after 1.5 hours of class and *mumble larger number* hours of
serious puzzled pondering, I have translated my first sentence of Old
Norse already! YES! BWAHA! I have had that HOLY MOLY I'M DOING IT feeling already!

I haven't looked up the official translation yet, but the way I see it, it says: "It
happened early in the beginning of settlement, when the gods built
Midgard and Valhalla, it came about that a certan builder offered to
build a stronghold in three seasons, so good in faith that it would be
secure against hill giants and frost giants, even if they came in
through Midgard; but he stipulated this as a reward, that he must
possess Freya, and he wished to have the sun and the moon."

And now, the official translation (drumroll): "It
was early in the beginning of the gods' dwelling (in Asgard), when the
gods had established Midgard and build Valhalla, that a certain
artificer came there and offered to build them, in three seasons, a
stronghold so good that it should be staunch and secure against the
hill-giants and frost-ogres, even if they got in over Midgard; but he
demanded as wages that he should have Freyja, and he would fain have
the sun and moon too."

Hey, not bad for a first try!

Trivia for today: Old Norse has
no indefinite article. So you can say "the tree" but if you mean "a
tree," you just say "tree." I know you were dying to learn that.

*heads off to ponder sentence #2 with renewed vigour...*

Well, maybe! Slowwwwwly.

Yep, I'm back at university full-time. I'll be at this from now until
the end of June next year, getting 4.5 credits to more-than-complete my
honours (four-year) BA.

In the next few weeks, I'll also be applying to do a master's degree at
a university closer to home. I hope I have more than a hair of a chance
to get in.

I'm settled into the apartment where I live while I'm in school. My
husband is on the webcam in the corner of the screen as we speak. We
got used to this last year, but I can't say we ever learned to like it.
Right now I feel quite smushed inside at the thought of not living with
him until next July, even though I will be visiting him on Friday.

I was just thinking of the value of the education I'm getting here. For
example, I've signed up for a private thesis course, one-on-one with a
highly respected professor. I'll be getting two hours' worth of
tutorials per week and doing massive research and writing during this
course. What did I pay? The same as for any other credit, just under
CDN$1000. What am I receiving? You cannot put a price on it. I'm in awe.

The twelve weeks of summer really allowed me to relax and get out of
the academic frame of mind. Between now and Wednesday morning, I'll be
gearing up. From summer to scholar in 48 hours flat.

Whooooo-oooooooooooo-ooooosh--------->   !

Well, I'm 42.

Wish I had the answer to life, the universe, and everything! But
various friends who have preceded me to this age assure me that this
revelation is not part of the deal. Oh well!

I spent yesterday at the Canadian National Exhibition in Toronto,
behaving like a kid. We watched some riders perform fun tricks with
horses and lassos. We took a two-horse wagon ride. We petted a donkey
named Hershey, and a miniature-horse foal no bigger than a labrador
retriever. We wandered the midway laughing at all the people risking
life and limb for a quick thrill! (Okay, it's not all that risky.) I
ate some fudge (blush) and some pierogies. We looked at some
of the near-infinite shops in the international and craft-show areas.
We saw a rose show. The CNE had a couple of history exhibits showing
photos, blueprints, souvenirs, and other artifacts from its own past.
The weather was both sunny and breezy. We finished up with dinner at a
nearby Persian restaurant and dessert at a favourite creperie, then
home! What a nice day.

Pretty much my last day of relaxation. School starts next Thursday, and
I gotta be ready. Woo, what a heavy year it's going to be! I just know
I'll love every minute.

Thanks for all your encouragements and birthday wishes. I'll come
'round to see some of you this evening. Sorry I haven't been able to
keep up with everyone the way I like to!

Have a great day.